???

Self centered? Stuck? Naive? Foolish? Trapped? Uneducated? Common Behavior and fear?

Why does it feel like I am a puzzle piece trying to fit in the wrong puzzle? Why is it that I know I am designated yet I am not positioned.

for instance when I date
things can be spectacular and in the same breath
-fear boils inside of me

I am starting to believe the closer someone gets to me

I then begin my process

of...

and you know the rest

In my religion we are taught to feel, I believe (my words) more so than we are taught to see facts

this is my interpretation...

but I am trying to understand why...

I always have to feel yet I am not trained to use logic

Is it my family dynamics or is it the culture of my religious experience?

why the hell am I like this?

Fear of rejection

I have a whole heart to give but...

History shows that doesn't work for me

it is almost like I have to play a cat and mouse game

to stay ahead

I want to be simple and protected

I get so wrapped up in someones presence to the point I feel lost without them.